simple wants...

went grocery shopping on both sat and sun alone.. weather is so hot and make me feel that the things that i bought which is not alot to be so much more heavier....

if onli a man is here..

if only i have a license den i can drive his car for grocery shopping.... =(

At home lazing around then finally decided to mend his trousers and iron his shirt after finishing my show haha .....

feel so weird making the cake alone.. much more work.. and cannot say 'darling can you help me to boil the water, darling can you help me to mix the mixture..' tat's y it took abit longer for me to finish making the tiramisu...

Sunday early noon start to wash, cut , prepare and cook his dinner... and that's when i realise i don't mind staying home to cook, i don't mind doing the household chores, i don't mind staying at home and wait for him to be back home... i love kids , i love to bake, i love my SO , i love my home to be neat and tidy and i love to see the smile on my SO when he came home and saw the meal prepared by me... every time... nv once did it fail... the only thing i hate is washing dishes... arugh... just hate it.. if i ever hire a maid for my future house, her job will only be washing the dishes n clothes...

i realise i'm just a simple ger in pursuit of simple happiness that's all...

again... and again.... and again...

my boy went fishing without me.....




again... =(




trying to wake up as late as possible so that the waiting time will be shorter.....





again....






alone at his place....





again...





eating with his family without him....





again.....






watching tv shows alone......





again.....






doing my assignment in his room alone....





again...





looking at the time hoping the time can pass faster best will be 7pm.....






again....







looking out the window hoping to see him and his car....






again.....






all this will come in a few days time again.... sUCkS.. =(

child abusing... horrible acts...

recently i attended lesson on child abuse.... it stirred up the emotions in me...

felt so sad when i heard the story and saw the video.. why would anyone sexually abused a young child? the video, even though it's fiction but somehow you know that somewhere out there, there are parents doing these kind of things... cruel words and actions...

they are idi*ts , a**hole and ba**ar*.. if they don't know how to take care, don't know how to appreciate, don't know how to dote their child why even in the first place give birth to them?

children understand what are you say and your actions... why hurt them?

why make them feel worthless and no self-esteem when you verbally abuse them?

why make them lose faith when you sexually abuse them?

a child should be brought up with love and care, they should not be victims of anger or frustration... they are so fragile and helpless and have to rely on the adults for help .... so why do that?

sexual abuse.. something that can never ever be forgiven... it's an 'memory' that will be with them all thru their life... it's something permanent and can never be forget no matter how hard they try to.. nobody can help a sexually abused victim.. send them for counselling? it might improve but still how to forget? nobody will understand how they feel unless they themself experience it.. the actions could be fondling or whatsoever but the feeling of being touch is horrible...

it's an act by perverts and psychos who cant find other ways of satisfying themselves.. child fetish? **c* it... go and find someone of their own size and do.. don't pray on children! how will the child feel? it will affect the child when they grow... they might become withdraw... their emotional well-being... why cant people think of the consequences before performing such acts? it's simply inhumane! the child will be so traumatized!

what's the cause behind those actions? a moment of folly, fun, their way of releasing stress? whatever it is, i believe nobody will be so kind to forgive these people.. as least not me...

my plan...

today i decided what i want to do....



1) carry on with my current job and do my best if i'm given more opportunity...





2) do my best in my part time specialist diploma in early childhood (graduate in bout 1yr 5mths)

3) Hope to be able to further my education in early childhood.

4) resign from my current job then work in a childcare...






5) Take up the professional make-up dip. at cosmosprof.... (then i can also do bridal make-up and hair styling, i love make-up, i'm juz a typical ger =D)







6) while working at childcare, start my own online business.... (if possible and able to source)

7) settled down when i'm 26... (might b early if anyone can make me change my mind =D )

8) Open my own childcare... ( it will b a dream come true if it reali happen)

disappointment...

i realise no matter how much we ask as long as we don't believe the person there's no point in asking...

wasting money... the things that girls want for are a waste of money.. so upset when i heard this.. don't they understand no matter how they feel shouldn't they put it in a nicer way? mayb it's meant to b a joke but it's not funny... or mayb i cant' take this kind of jokes....

not feeling too good right now... disappointed...

wish that someone could be beside me now.. i don't need him to say or do anything, juz stay beside me, hold my hand and tell me that everything will be fine.. juz keep me company.. sometimes it's this kind of moments, when u're feeling insecure and in need of someone for u to rely giving u the sense of security that u're lacking...

i guess that person simply juz forgot about it.. or else it could be me throwing a tantrum, mood swings or whatever you can think of that is not necessary... maybe he had gotten used to it and don't see any point in doing anything anymore... mayb his patience run out... maybe he did but it's not what i want..

alot of maybes.... i don't know.... if those are the maybes...

time changes people, be it good or bad... you like it or don't like it....

relationship changes over time... the way partner treat one another changes... that's what everyone is saying.. but yet it's up to individual... depends on your luck..

are the things i want as simple as i want it to be? am i as simple as what i thought i am?

my bday already over, someone who claim that he will always wish me did not do so.. even when we are juz frds... he once mentioned that he nv want to lose a frd like me and that he hate the feeling that he's losing me as a frd but yet what had he done to preserve this frdship of ours? Every misunderstanding we had had to be clear up by me and he never bother to do anything.. what kind of frd is he? taking advantage? every time we chat, the whole conversation seem to surround him and nothing about me.. what is this? told him that i don't get the things that he tellin me yet he still carry on and after that juz say he's talking to a wall and bye.. f*** what the hell! don't he understand ppl need to work and that it's so rude to cut off the conversation juz like that?

anyway....

promises are meant to be broken.. how many people is this world reali keep to their words?

our baking and cooking session..

Strawberry cake

weekend was fulfilling =)

Friday went to buy the necessary equipments for baking, actually onli the mixer cos the rest my SO's house already have le.. haha

saturday went to buy the ingredients ... and evening time we started baking.. and this is the only time where i actualli took pix during de process as i'm not too occupy and let the machine do the job =D

this is the first time that we reali 'bake' a cake, the previous 2 times are all no-bake cake... muz start with the simplest then progress.. hehe

me n my SO started playing around (as usual) prepare and mix all the ingredients then place it in the oven for 55mins...

after that ,wash-up (i HATE washing!!) and went to the room to watch a tv show 'wet dreams' it was reali funny, the guy farts whenever he get aroused there's one part when he and his frd are at the swimming pool and this sexy girl came along, he saw him and he immediately get into the pool and after that u see alot of bubbles coming up.. lol

we didn't finish the show cos the both of us were too excited bout the cake so went to check on the cake.. the moment we open the room door we can smell the butter cake! yUMMy! but it wasn't reali ready yet so after awhile we went to check on it again. Finally it was ready!




Before decorating

after this he start to make the whipped cream... this part was solely carried out by my SO =)

and i start to cut the strawberries for decor!

after this we started decorating the cake.. this is so fun....

and we are done! so proud of ourself.. the best part is, his family find it nice and like it! my SO's mum even ask me to bake one on my SO's sis wedding... =) cant stop smiling... was so happy!

after baking, we went to have prata and mee goreng for dinner with my SO and his group of friends....

sunday was even better... SO woke up early in the morning to prepare and cook the ingredients to make popiah juz cos i say i wan to eat.. so sweet =) ... they even have a special family receipt for this.....

popiah was yummy! i love his cooking he can reali cook.. sometime i feel so inferior that he cooks so much better then me... =( i know it's not a big deal but then again i'm a girl lei, i'm suppose to be a better cook then him, i'm the one who suppose to tie him down with good food not the other way round... Hmpf *angry* got to work harder!!

lunch prepared by SO and his mum =)

in the late afternoon we went to see house with my SO's sis n her bf cos they gettin married, it's fun! get to see how ppl house look like haha... only see a short while then we leave already cos i tink also nothin much.. opps....

dinner was cooked by my SO again.. haha he's juz so sweet....

my bday!!

B'day was fantastic =)

Surprise 1 ; pink tulips send to my office ;)

my favourite flower tulips!

Colleague kept smiling at me and we started chatting about what flowers we recieved before..

First...

Cafe del mar

Our table number

We ordered a tapas, 2 mains & 2 juices it's more then enough ....

Warm seasonal mushroom

Fettuccine Champignon

Grilled Succulent Lamp Chops

The food was good, ambiance was nice and scenery was enhance b'cos of his presence =)

Next....

Songs of the sea

it wasn't reali much about story but more bout the lights and water... the effects was simply breathtaking... Oh there's also fireworks! but only for a short while. The combination of the lights, water and fireworks reali make you go 'WAH!'

juz so sweet of him to bring me to de show (i been talking about it) haha

Went back to the car to take the flowers out for some photo-taking session haha and at the same time to get ourself a drink.

he suddenly open the car boot,

Da tang!!

Surprise 2 ; a gigantic Tasmania devil with a big ribbon on his head =)

it's was so ccUUTeee, especially the ribbon.... i was so surprise... and i just cant stop laughing...

He ask me to look around for another surprise....

look around the car boot, nothing.. started searching the Tasmania devil and i found it;

surprise 3 ; citigems I'nova earrings behind de tongue of the Tasmania devil =D

naughty darlin... amaze that he found and got it for me i love that earrings... there's also a small card with sweet writings that are meant for my eyes only...

walk around sentosa and took photos,

the staff saw and volunteer to take pix for us *smile* thank you

went to take some pixs with oscar (the star of songs of the sea but i don't understand why is he de star when he only appear in the show for less then 10times) at the entrance of the shop after the staff say 'no obligations'. after that we went into the shop to have a look at the photo that they took. It was reali nice , so ended up we bought the photos, but it's also for remembrance =) The best part was, my SO told the staff that it's my bday and they started singing the bday song to me, i'm so paiseh. But it's was so sweet...

this is a photo frm a photo so it's look kinda funny (keke) but i still love it anyway he got another one but different oscar =)

went back to the car and head straight home, i couldn't stop smiling and till now i'm still wondering and cant believe that he came up with all this ideas... btw, he's not a romantic person, that's why... =D

Reali enjoyed myself so much n i'm so thankful to have an SO like him who put in so much effort and killed so many of his brain cells just to see me smile...

thank you love =)

And an ang bao from my mother! =) last surprise before my day end